What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
