it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Bring me that man meat
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
