I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
