I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize