Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Randomize
