so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
