You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Randomize
