yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
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