Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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