Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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