Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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