my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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