I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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