Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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