I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
