I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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