so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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