Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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