its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
i drank out of a bidet.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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