How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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