Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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