the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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