.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
