I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize