It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
