She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
