just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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