there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I think i got beer on your cat.
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