I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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