Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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