Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
