Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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