brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize
