ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
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