Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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