i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
