Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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