If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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