you guys were way drunker than both of me
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
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