Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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