I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
