If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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