at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize