sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize