So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
