Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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