We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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