his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
