i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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