and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
