Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
